Catastrophes in the kitchen

Today I thought I’d review some of my unsuccessful forays in the kitchen for your edification and entertainment.

1. One day, after reading about how my children were most certainly vitamin D and DHA deficient in an annoying parenting magazine at the doctor’s office, I decided I needed to make salmon for dinner that very night. I had to head off this nutritional crisis immediately!  I went to the grocery store with two screaming, feverish kids, bought the salmon, carefully prepared it, and felt triumphant. Then my three year-old cried after she tasted it. The one year old just spit it out. They did not seem affected by parenting magazine hysteria and still refuse to eat salmon.

2. After toiling away for hours, making the marinara sauce from scratch, boiling noodles, and whisking away at a complicated béchamel sauce, all the while with a 5 week old in a baby Bjorn strapped to my chest, I presented this glorious lasagna to my then-husband. He said, “It looks great!” with enthusiasm, got up out of the table, got a bottle of ketchup, and squirted it all over the lasagna. This time I was the one who cried.

3. One night I decided that butternut squash soup would be the solution to augmenting my children’s vegetable intake. Did I mention that I was in a sleep deprived haze when I made this decision? At any rate, I made the soup. I am still amazed I did not lose a finger “peeling” the squash (as an aside, it is much easier to roast a squash, THEN peel it, but I didn’t know that then).  I discovered that my immersion blender didn’t work at all, right at the very same moment that the Wonder Pets had wrapped up rescuing the baby bird. I found myself trying to transfer the hot soup to my food processor and simultaneously fending off curious toddlers to prevent them from getting burned, and burning my own hand in the process. Post food processor, the soup still didn’t have the perfect texture. By then it was 6.30pm, and my (then) husband was home from work. I told him that we were having soup for dinner, and in my sleep deprived haze I suddenly realized that vegetable soup was not nearly enough food for a 6 foot tall person who runs 50 miles a week. But he looked at me, saw I was not to be messed with, and ate the soup. The kids refused to touch it, because they are never afraid to mess with me.

Anyhow, I think the moral of these stories just could be

·        Don’t read parenting magazines

·        Don’t make anything too complicated

·        Go to bed early whenever you can.

Hope you have a happy cooking week!

XOXO Christina